I feel totally compelled to write about crying and to let you mom’s know that it is okay to cry and not feel guilty. Yesterday was awful for me. I experienced beautiful moments followed by absolute freaking horrid moments. Let me break down my day.
Yesterday Broken Down
It was 8am, got the girls from their rooms and dressed for the day. Fed them breakfast, just like everyday. I was feeling good about our timing so I jumped in the shower, very quickly of course. Blow dried my hair, put makeup on and put on clothes that was not workout apparel. I was feeling great, looked at myself in the mirror and wanted to high-five! I don’t have days that often when things are working out to focus on me. But, as I was getting ready Sissy tossed clothes into the toilet and tried to flush it. Thankfully for my cat-like reflexes I was able to save the situation by grabbing the clothes just in time!
After I got beautified, I was hanging out with my girls and I told Sissy that I loved her, which I do a lot. For the first time EVER, she said “love you mama”, I cried. Happy cry of course. But, yes I sobbed. I tend to cry over my kids rolling over for the first time, walking, crawling… basically all their firsts. Don’t judge me, I know you have done it too!
Moving on, we were running errands, everything was going great. We stopped by their daddy’s work to say hi to him and papa(Hubby’s dad). Everything was awesome until we are in the car pulling out of is work and Sis is flipping the heck out which of course makes me sad and teary eyed. I am not sure if she just misses him or if she would rather hang out with him than me! I don’t know, but I try not to think about the later part that often, I like to think that I am the fun parent!
When S*** Hit the Fan
Sis has had 2 instances where she was put down for a nap in a dress or just a shirt and pull-up and she gets her dirty diaper off and smears poop all over the place. Walls, crib, stuffed animals, you name it… its god awful. So I started to put her down for nap with shorts on, because she hadn’t yet figured out how to get those off… Until yesterday when shit literally hit the fan. I mean I knew as soon as I walked up to her door, that she pooped, but with her shorts on I thought that we are totally good. Wow, I was so mistaken. This was the third time, it was EVERYWHERE! Like, seriously, why me. I don’t want to scrub poop out of carpet, or off the wall.
The first two times were kinda funny. Basically because when I walked in she would be like yo mom what’s up? Poop that’s what. But this time, I was completely over it. I felt defeated, like how the heck am I supposed to keep a diaper on this kid now? Duct Tape it to her? No I can’t do that! So I called my husband to tell him what happened and he started laughing… I started sobbing, like look at here dude, you haven’t had to scrub poop off of places poop doesn’t below so stop freaking laughing before I reach through the phone and punch you in the face… would never do that but wow I felt completely defeated.
So after nap time, we played, then I started making dinner. Well while I was making dinner, Sis found a little toy garden shovel and proceeded to scoop toilet water out of the porcelain pot and dump it on Jojo. Sis thought she was hilarious. I wanted to cry but I held it in, gave the baby a bath and by this time my head was hurting. My brain was completely exhausted. I was able to get them down for bed at 7 and after that I sat and cried for a few. Yesterday sucked. All moms have had a day like this and I just want to let you know that it is okay to cry!
Some moms have found they have guilt. Guilt about wanting to cry over something their children have done that is completely f***ed up and you’re sitting there like why is this happening to me? Guilt about contemplating going back to work to gain some kind of sanity back. Even guilt about taking time for yourself. There are so many things that moms feel guilt about. Crying is one of those things that we feel guilty about because we feel that we need to be strong and that we can conquer all. That we don’t want our children to see us cry but you know what? You deserve to cry. Crying is good for us on occasion!
Crying allows you to relieve stress, and it also allows you to boost your mood. When you have days when you feel defeated, cry. It is totally ok! Promise! Don’t feel guilty about it, more so think about it as relieving stress to have a better mood for your children. When you cry, ask your kiddo for a hug. It is great for them to see you cry too that way they develop the idea that people other than them can hurt too. It teaches them compassion.
So, cry it out for a few minutes then suck it up buttercup. You need to push on and finish your day! Pour yourself a glass of wine or two and relax. Go to bed early and sleep that day away! Get great beauty rest and wake up bright-eyed and bushy-tailed ready to start a new day! Read a book, specifically this book: Hope Unfolding: Grace-Filled Truth for the Momma’s Heart. This book will uncover beautiful messages that will help brighten your day! Can’t find time to read? Create a 15 minute book time with your kids. Everyday for 15 minutes they flip through a book and you read yours! Good luck mom! You’ve got this!